mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
I awoke in a cab to find myself on a ride to niagara falls. Apparently I paid the cab driver half up front.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
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