i would punch a child for taco bell
Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
I was freaked out. No man over 50 is allowed to touch me. Ever. Unless you're Michael Bolton. Then please do.
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
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