You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth... fuckin epic
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
Dont act like I'm the only one that gets on a plane and picks out the one im gonna have fuck if we have time before the crash
$100 bras are my way of telling my boobs that I love and appreciate them, and all the metaphorical doors they have opened for me.
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
My dog misses eating marshmallows out of your butt when you're passed out. That bordered on sex abuse, now that I think about it. My bad.
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
Randomize
