I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
If there is ever a next time, care about me enough to lube it up no matter what my drunk ass says
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize
