Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
Sorry I kept grabbing your vagina at the casino. I believed it was my lucky unicorn to win bonuses
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
There's "red head", "preppy white girl" and "the two Asians I dated and now everyone thinks I like Asians"
Your dating history is like the united colors of Benetton
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
I realized today that the only things I'm guaranteed to have with me at all times are lipgloss, condoms and a USB drive. hmmm...
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
Randomize