Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
Randomize
