just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
when i told him i was pregnant with his baby he texted me 'congradulations'
i pity the fetus.
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
Why did you fed-x me a peanut butter sandwich?
It seemed like the thing to do. There's popcorn on it too.
STOP smoking sooo much weed. Damn
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
I DONT KNOW HOW I'M NOT DEAD, JESUS CHRIST ON A DOUBLE DECKER FUCKING KEANU REEVES BUS
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
I TAUGHT HER CAT TO SIT. CATS DON'T FUCKING SIT ON COMMAND. BUT THIS ONE DID!
It's basically my crowning achievement.
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
Randomize
