I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
She keeps sending, "show me your elephant trunk."
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
Randomize
