The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
I just got an email from a bridal website with the subject "Countdown to your Wedding Day"... is 11AM too early to drink the rest of the wine we have?
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
Randomize
