i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
things that need to be invented #43: vodka that also acts as birth control.
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
I just don't fit in here. The other wives are ten years older and have kids!
Well, you chose trophy wife of a 35 year old over college. Sit in your suburban soup and stew.
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
I'm chasing my vodka with snickers.
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
It started with drunk jenga and ended with me simultaneously peeing and puking on his feet in the tub while he held me up. I met Tequila. I don't like her.
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
Randomize
