You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
That time we were having sex when you were super drunk, I kept yelling out, "Oh God," and you said, "You're going to need him after this." Idk why I suddenly thought of that.
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
Listen, you eat the donut. I eat you out. Everybody wins.
Seriously though, I walked in and he was holding my cat in the air singing "the circle of life"...
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
Randomize
