I hit her tiny dog with a horseshoe an hour ago. Her and her mom cried as it laid on the ground shaking. Im drunk.
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
Hate the very realistic pregnancy dreams. Like my dream when I birthed the pirate ships. SO REAL...
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
It was his birthday and he drunkenly offered me Portillo's and diamonds in exchange for a snap chat of my boobs. Even sober it seemed like a good idea at 3 in the morning.
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
Randomize
