Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
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