i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
Randomize
