I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
I was pretty stoned. I thought I needed a seatbelt at the restaurant.
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
Randomize