Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
You called me twice to tell me that you spit in your own eye, when I was right next to you.
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
Oh wait looks like my cousin is getting deported THERE'S HOPE FOR THIS CHRISTMAS YET
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
Woman at starbucks on her computer with a garbage bag of popcorn and a bottle of lotion. Where are you coming from?!
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
Randomize