I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
So... My dad just saw the Plan B package and the beer cans in my backseat.
Oh its cool I'm sure he already knows you're a whore and an alcoholic.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
Decided to stay in tonight. Completely sober. Just got two drunken booty calls within 5 minutes of each other. This is my life.
Randomize