whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
Hey, what did you end up doing with those ski goggles?
Anything is possible. I didn't even know I was wearing the toilet cover as a hat
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
In other news, just had to pluck an ingrown pub with the pliers from my multi tool while sitting on the toilet at work.
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
So I took a screenshot of my boarding pass and the TSA agent somehow swiped it to the next photo. Yep...TSA saw my dick before I even went through the body scanner.
Randomize
