Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
So I went on a date with this girl...and whos our waitress? My girlfriend got a second job she didn't tell me about to afford my bday present.
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
Well, I'll handle this like I always do. Black the fuck out, make out with randoms, give out my number like candy. You know. Standard operating procedure
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
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