I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
if i'm ever as drunk as the girl in front of me... kill me.
Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
I hate ducks.
What?
they're sketch. like squirrels. squirrels are sketch as fuck.
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
Super stoned right now. And I stared at my exit, thought to myself "hey self. That is your exit" and I kept driving right past it.
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
I just swiped right for a guy on Tinder solely because it looked like he was holding Zoboomafoo
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
Randomize
