i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
You know i'm the father figure
Yeah the father who ate her out with me last night. Great dad
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
Randomize
