If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
Quick, to the slutcave!
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
Can you please venmo me emergency money? i have no pants.
You said "I feel like a koala bear. Do you ever just feel like a koala bear?" This is your brain on drugs.
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
Randomize
