halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
I'm sitting alone in a bar pretending to watch football because I don't know where the liquor store is around here and I'll be god damned I'm going to be sober on my day off.
Randomize