last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
Randomize
