we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
I've never felt more disgusting in my life. And I'm including the time I snuggled that homeless woman in the puddle of my whiskey vomit.
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
Randomize
