actually, I'm a sock model
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
A guy wearing a shirt that says "eat shit and die motherfucker" just held open a door for me. He's got manners.
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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