STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
i'm pleased to announce i can now open a bottle of wine with my shoe if called upon to do so.
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
Dont act like I'm the only one that gets on a plane and picks out the one im gonna have fuck if we have time before the crash
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
THERE IS NOT ENOUGH CAPSLOCK IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD TO EXPRESS MY CURRENT STATE OF WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
Randomize
