omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
I have demons in me.
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
You disinfected one of his friends, buttered the jeans of the other one. And you poured every liquid you could reach on the floor, including cooking oil and green tea. It wasnt a great first impression
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
I take back all the times I've said life was unfair. I'm about to have two trained bartenders for a girlfriend and roommate
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
Are you aware that you called your mom to say hi before you dragged the random guy into bed last night?
Randomize
