I'm gonna have a badass scar
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
She must have been at ribfest tonight because my dick smells like barbeque sauce
my wrists were so small for the handcuffs, i could slip them off and hand the tow truck driver my keys....
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
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