She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
If I was gonna be at your campus for halloween weekend, I'd dress up as the masked horny fairy and give out condoms. I'm so thoughtful.
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
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