your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
On the airplane today the pilot actually said "Ladies and gentlemen I'm sorry for the delay. But I know all of you have problems, and so do we..."
I'll wind up on his doorstep with a confused "oh you live here" expression, a feigned ankle injury and a seemingly fortunately placed bottle of tequila. I don't care what it takes: HIS MOUTH WILL BE ON MOUTH.
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
Nothing says Merry Christmas like gifting a bottle of rum and finishing it yourself then leaning over at the dinner table to puke it back up.
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
I was just tryna bring you beer girl. I should've known you'd be shirtless though
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize
