But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
Dude someone is playing the piano in the other room while I shit and it's making it really peaceful
I have an explanation for how we got this drunk this fast... but you wont like it. We are officially in complete liver failure.
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
I know you're here! I can hear your phoneeeee. Wake up and do illegal things with me.
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
Randomize
