covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
I hear youre working today. To keep you entertained, ive compiled a list of condiments that my dick has NOT been slathered in since last Friday: Relish, and raspberry jam. That's right.
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
I got caught throwing up in my daughters princess potty... On the bright side it played a rewarding tune afterwards.
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
Randomize
