Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
I told my mom happy mother's day then rubbed my belly and said "Oh, and happy grandmother's day too..." She started sobbing. You were right, that wasn't the best way to tell her.
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
Randomize
