Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
I mistook a propane tank for a keg.
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
Randomize
