I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
I'm surprised I haven't crapped out a leprechaun, I'm so hungover
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
Since I fall down so much at parties I've started doing this new thing where when I fall I just yell FLOOR PARTY and make people bring the party to me
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
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