He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
she's on the floor slapping my dogs face with slices of pizza
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
Congrats on dating a convict, there's no fitbit badge for that one.
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
I bought two pregnancy tests and a cosmopolitan magazine at 4am... I told the cashier "dont judge me, ur not God"
I'm just going to use my debit card. I feel bad buying pizza with the money I stole from my roommate...so I'm going to put it in my piggy bank.
Randomize
