omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
FYI... At my funeral, it will be your job to throw yourself dramatically onto my casket.
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
Legit just heard the bartender tell some Dude "Penis is not an accepted currency in this establishment" and Dude responded "You take Vagina then?"
Randomize
