Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
Im forcing mysellf to pee so i can fit more margaritas in me...
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
Brandon's Recipe: two parts cocoa, one part sugar, one part milk, two parts four, 378 parts paranoia. Thanks for the fucking brownies, bitch.
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
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