READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
I need a horse. I don't think you can get a DUI on a living creature.
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
I feel like I got hit by a truck. Or a baby dinosaur. One of them ran over my body and then stuck me in a blender of fire and storm clouds
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
I do feel like I owe you an apology for trying to fuck your dad last night but in my defense everyone knows I shouldn't drink tequila.
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
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