heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
im calling her cock vulture from now on
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
Poorly worded request for dick pic resulted in stoned beanie selfies and "lol". Miscommunication is the devil's cock block.
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
He came home at 2 AM on roller skates with his hair dyed pink while singing "Sweet Transvestite" and throwing glitter on all of us and everything we own. We had to call a cleaning guy.
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Randomize
