Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
If I could I'd magically teleport drugs and alcohol to you. Like a bad decision fairy.
I met my future wife last night. She's a bombshell from Delaware, hates Trump, and humiliated two old men in a GOP healthcare debate while simultaneously convincing them to pick up both of our bar tabs.
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
Randomize
