Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
I learned much from the teen babysitter: I can light a cigarette in a microwave.
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
I'm pretty sure last night was the first time I've seen someone drink beer-soaked paper towels. Ever.
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
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