The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
i just threw up in front of the washington monument. such a scenic puke.
I walked in on him cutting a hole in the condom.
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
Woke up this morning on my doorstep in a basket with a branch, a lipstick lightning bolt on my head and a sign that said "the boy who lived." i love you guys.
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
I'm pretty sure I just discovered what the American Dream is said the person eating a hotdog for breakfast in bed in her underwear
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
Just saw a man downtown with a cat just riding on his shoulder like a furry parrot. He may be homeless, but I think he's your soul mate.
My dick has a subreddit
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
do nipples grow back?
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
Randomize
