I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
I just brought the toaster out onto the porch to light a cigarette, don't talk to me about being desperate.
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
I had a drinkin contest with a person that didnt exsist, fuck withdrawl day
Hold on are you sure that we dont have another roommate?
Yes.
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
Is it weird that I'm mad at my boss because he isn't paying me enough attention? Maybe my dad issues are worse than I thought
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
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