Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
'Well you know, stuff happens' isn't really an excuse for sticking a cheeto in my ear
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
It's like jay gatsby himself preordained that our genitals meet again.
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
In hindsight, maybe rearranging his living room because he has OCD while he was out wasnt the greatest idea. Though it'll keep him busy for HOURS
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