I just realized i haven't had sex in 2009. oh man thats embarrassing.
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
Penises. Penises everywhereeeeeeeee. Penis ratio is sooo disproportionate. I can't NOT get laid tonight.
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
Is there ever a non-asshole time to play the "I was a child prodigy" card?
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
Randomize
