Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
Last night, my friend changed all my contacts in my phone. I have been texted by Batman, Donatello, and Hermione Granger. I have no idea who they are, and it doesn't upset me at all.
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
the russians are downstairs with the vodka loudly proclaiming happy birthday america. i don't care if it's the fourth, i care that it's 9 am and they woke me up.
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
I am alternating between eating dry cheerios and mint chocolate chip ice cream with a fork. Please love me because no one else will
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
My husband was abducted by a group of disco dancers in the parde and danced off down the street. If you see him, tell him to Hustle on home and clean the cat box. #MardiGras
I'm bleeding and have questions
Babe, I'm gunna be straight with you. When you act like a dick it makes me regret not fucking my manager last week.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
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