Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
I love that your last three texts to me were "Drunk." "Getting laid." "In the hospital."
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
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