I'm so drunk I cant read cursive anymore.
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
Just pulled over to throw up in a day care parking lot while the kids were outside playing. The adults were mortified.
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
Also I feel like 60% of our relationship is based on sausage mcmuffins.
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
That accounts for only three of the penises
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
Randomize
